...

The Young Sheldon dilemna

There are plenty forms of the idea, but I want to talk about the "quirky nerd".

To preface, there is nothing wrong about being a quirky nerd. But the attitude held by the current zeitgeist is different. Subtly but significantly so. A message of a rejection of shame has turned into a message of praise.

I am pointing the finger at young Sheldon (I guess big bang theory sheldon too). I havent watched the show(s) myself, but the clips I have seen exhibit the same attitude I suspected. The idea that "Sheldons socially debilitating quirks and nerdiness are actually a GOOD thing, they give him special nerd genius powers that make him special and so much more amazing!!11!!1."

If youre nerdy or just cant seem to get into the trends of your peers, its whatever, its fine, dont worry about it. But the idea that whatever drawbacks these traits cause should be waved off because of their "genius making" benefits is a grave mistake . "Dont worry little Jimmy, you might not have any friends and no one likes you, but that doesnt matter! Thats all because you hold the unbearable burden of being an eccentric genius, so youre actually the one winning at the end of the day!"

We are fundamentally social creatures, dismissing your need for social connection because being a genius is a desirable payoff is terrible advice. Firstly, being a genius isnt correlated in any way of being a nerd. So if that person doesnt meet these expectations, we instead create a disappointed and lonely person. Carelessly encouraging a stereotype to a person who may fail at meeting expectations may introduce a rude awakening if they fall short. A sort of gifted kid syndrome that leaves a person feeling wholly deficient if not met.

Secondly, this idea not only reduces any perceived need to develop socially, it may actually promote going against social ability. If being more weird and more of an outcast makes you more of a genius (as one may mistakenly deduce) then why not abhor social life in favor of "developing" intellect? That person then becomes incredibly socially stunted, on purpose, due to fallacious reasoning.

Thirdly, if the need for socializing becomes too strong, especially in the early years, then resentment may build. And in the case of the modern age, resented people may meet and form closed off groups. Of some of the ways this may turn out, a negative and not uncommon occurrence is the formation of echo chambers. In here, sentiments that social exclusion is actually the fault of their peers are birthed. Or other beliefs mentioned are strengthened. This may call to mind incel groups, where their trouble is everyones fault but their own.

Again, I dont hold the position that nerds deserve to be lonely. Nor do I believe that lonely people brought about their misfortune on themselves, or that every nerd is waiting to become some evil deviant. Only that if we take nerd as how its actually used (a person obsessive about something and lacking social skills), encouraging nerdiness isnt a good idea. We can encourage freedom of expression and discourage shame in pursuing something wholeheartedly without complicating social awkwardness as a tradeoff for these things.